April 2013
1 post
WatchThe Porchistas campy play on the obvious - Zombie Jesus
June 2012
1 post
The Porchistas "Zombie Jesus" →
Listen for free or download for a buck - 5th track off of “the baby album.” spread the zombie love.
April 2012
1 post
Watchlisten to the porchistas last cd - “save the earth”
November 2011
1 post
WatchThe Porchistas Alan & Waking Lights Nicole - violin and acoustic guitar duet. Do it!
August 2011
1 post
The Porchistas "Nuke the World" Music Video →
Montclair NJ’s The Porchistas song “Nuke the World” off their CD “Save the Earth”. Produced by Eileen Richardson. All 16mm shots are original footage by Richardson from Central and South America including The Panama Canal. The digi-nukes are from Japanese artist Isao Hashimoto’s digital depiction of the history of nuclear testing. Explicit lyrics.
December 2009
10 posts
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Quotes from the blizzard - Rachel Butera
me - wanna take a walk in the blizzard?
Butera - hahaha, for chrissakes dont you know me by now? i’m a guido broad i dont walk in the snow.
Painting Mountains
dragonflies:
The mountains are driving me crazy, and they’re not done being created. They never are… mountains constantly reinvent themselves, moving skyward, retreating into their own, slowly crumbling to the ground, resting…
Maybe this is why they are so difficult to paint.
Or maybe, it is because they are so similar to our kind. The artist formerly known as Nathan told me today “when you...
The Chair, The People, The Jungle, a photgraphy... →
introducing the sweet and furiant, sconey joplin
Do you hate me now?
Does my presence make you hard
I’m sure that your feelings toward me now far outweigh any previous encounters
You enter standing above me…forcing me to look up
Your eyes now manage to pierce my mouth shut
My how things have changed
What reaction are you expecting as you spew hateful words in my direction
Her spread legs will not affect me
Whore’s are...
How the Christians Stole Christmas →
None of the traditional christmas elements come from the birth of ole JC. whether its santa claus or the yule log, hollie, or the christmas tree, the Christians stole their symbols and good tidings from the bad, bad pagans. Click on “How the christians stole christmas” above to learn how!
blow up christmas decorations, strawberries, bees...
Over the last 10 years or so those shitty-ass, gigantic, ugly blow-up Christmas decorations have become the norm on front lawns across america. Who the fuck are the people who buy these big pieces of plastic shit, and do they really think they look good? Is there anything that signifies a society that lacks creativity more than those energy using eye-sores? I have fantasized several times...
Charmkin rebellion →
this here song and video are the productions of a guy named victor who i met in LA around, what? 9 years ago? He was a fuckin wild-man, a true bestia. He had a dog named Daisy who died recently. She was the coolest fucking dog I ever met. If i remember correctly they were homeless at the time. Daisy was a thief and had fleas and back then Victor liked all kinds of drugs. I think he teaches...
November 2009
18 posts
Debaucherous Night Before Thanksgiving Stories...
So before my friend Sandy realized she’s an alcoholic and before Hellfire, the sex/fetish club in the “meat-packing district”, became an Italian restaurant, she and I enjoyed frequenting said shady club.
One particular night, while I was home from college for Thanksgiving, Sandy called to ask if I wanted to go to a diner. “Sure” I say because I’m looking for a quiet night out with one of my...
Debacherous Night Before Thanksgiving Stories Part...
At the annual night before Thanksgiving town reunion at Frenchy’s in Roselle Park.
Had a scotch. Had another scotch. Then a few more scotches. When I had enough there I stumbled across the street to the Sun Tavern to have a beer, because I had enough scotch. Once I realized how drunk I was, I declined, and had a glass of water.
I dont remember who drove me home, but when I got there,...
Debacherous Night Before Thanksgiving Stories Part...
I’m not proud of the fact that years back I used to spend alot of time and money in strip clubs. This was the pre lap-dance years. I was working as a foreman in a warehouse that sold outdoor furniture. On payday, me and a bunch of the guys would cash our checks and head to Spank’y Go-Go Bar in an industrial neighborhood in the lower end of West Orange, New Jersey. Everyone knew...
Debacherous Night Before Thanksgiving Stories Part...
I’m sure there are plenty of stories on Thanksgiving eve but my stoner mind and now my mother mind can’t remember them all but one I do recall is the day I came back from Amsterdam. We arrived in the afternoon and being in Amsterdam for 5 days, I was hung-over already and my throat was killing from the tremendous reefer we smoked! Anyhow, my girlfriend Toni begged me to go out and I obliged...
NIGHT BEFORE THANKSGIVING DEBAUCHEROUS HORROR...
please send your very short and debaucherous stories about the night before thanksgiving to:
alansmith101@gmail.com
for submission today so we can have a full day of reading really icky stories about how bad things really get the night before thanksgiving.
due to overwhelming democratic worldwide rebellion...
1) It might die when its a teenager, leaving you riddled with sadness and guilt
2) It might end up being someone you hate, ie an asshole, a republican, or one of those guys on Jackass or girls on America’s Top Model. …
3) It might be born “mentally challenged”, an emotional and financial burden.
4) It might inherit the worst genetic and social characteristics of both parents.
...
10 Reasons to not make babies deleted!
due to an overwhelming negative response from parents the world over, our last post titled “10 reasons to not make babies” has been removed from this site. congratulations baby-makers, youve scored one for population density!
Freud, Me, and All That Shit (Ladies and Gentlemen...
ughdie:
One hadn’t seen or spoken to her father in six years despite living in the same town. When the the old fool died, the walls of his dingy flat were yellow from cigarette smoke. There were squares and rectangles of glimmering whiteness behind the photos on the walls.
Another took four or five years of sexual abuse and merciless beatings from her old man before he finally cleared out. His...
inanimate love (pen and water color by the very...
artbynicolai:
The Lightning The Hawk and The Rainbow
During the rainy season, late afternoon, in a dense tropical jungle, a group of 5 best friends play horse shoes, drink beer, and smoke kind bud, after a noble day of labor. The clouds mosey quickly through the valley in front of them. The friends are at the edge of a flatspot that drops off to an old growth rain forest. The tops of ancient trees meet them at eye level. A warm rain falls...
The Little Green Army Man (written by my lil sis,...
My one and only vivid memory from childhood
I sat on the olive green carpet of my family’s living room in Newark circa 1975 surrounded by my brother’s collection of little green army men. You can be sure I had no permission to be playing with his stuff.
I can’t explain how I got there or what I was doing before it happened. All I can tell you is I was sitting there with these little green army...
Pacific Rainbows (written by brian "sparky"...
It’s the two people that see dolphins swimming together on a foggy day between monoliths stranded in the wading waters. They see rainbows forming perfect doorways to sandy beaches between rock wall ladders. Peering eyes detect nothing but previously conceived ideas and unwanted possibility, even in its purest form. Redwood branches hang the soul and lift the mind to salvatory grace with souls...
Creativity Day (written by the Myth, Deivis...
On Creativity Day my Pop-Pop took me to Odyssey-World. At Odyssey-World we made an action figure of myself. My “Self” (the action figure version) looked like this: The head of Johnny Achilles (just like the official movie version which is based on the cereal that inspired the TV series). My torso and limited edition Gung Fu Grip from the official chest of Marshall Mars Warblood - the...
3 tags
At Bioneers By The Bay ...
In her keynote speech, discussing the systematic corporate pillaging of our planet, Vindana Shiva asked, “Did anyone ever ask the earth worm?” I was immediately stopped by imagery within the question and it took me to the line in Trina Paulus’ book “Hope for the Flowers,” “Without butterflies the world would have few flowers.” Later, these two...
The blowjob that never was (written by the very...
In 1986 I was a tubby little 14-year old who wanted two things in life: to be pretty and to be with Anthony C. He was two years older, a fact I never realized would bring me such torture from his friends in the years ahead. With a big Roman nose, giant, hazel eyes that framed in long dark eyelashes and curly brown hair, Anthony was an Italian Adonis. A wrestler to boot, his body was lithe and...
5 tags
October 2009
24 posts
8 tags
My Family Gambles Part 12- Lyrics to “The...
5 tags
Mischief Night
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I am lucky to know that I have the greatest father in the world. Not for the obvious reasons, like, he is the most humble person I’ve ever met. Or because he has spent his entire life giving selflessly. Or because I think I am a decent human being because he was my model of what it means to be a good person. These reasons,...
Ghosts, goats, the end of the world, and...
6:30 am.
Nana asks me to see whether my grandfather would like some banana pancakes. Sure. I follow the narrow staircase down to the basement. The pale yellow light is as eerie as ever, reminding me of each time I’d reluctantly go down to play “scary in the dark,” our family’s twisted version of hide-and-go-seek. I used to sit under mom’s empty horse saddle next to the bookshelves,...
11 tags
My Family Gambles Part 11 "The Brewery"
Gino got a job at The Pabst Brewery on South Orange Avenue because of his old man’s seniority status. Once there, the relatively well paying job with health care, vacation and union security, was not enough for his character and ambition. So he ran numbers, and as far as I know, kicked back to noone. One guy, lets call him Little Mickey, was on a bad losing streak and couldn’t pay. ...
7 tags
My Family Gambles Part 10 "Gino Cappelletti"
This journal entry was written 1-29-05, on a bus from San Jose, Costa Rica on the way to the grandely notorious, ghetto fishing hub of Puntarenas, a few days after my Uncle Gino died.
Gino Cappelletti. The obit said 69 years old. It lied I think. Gino and his 2 sisters were put in an orphanage run by nasty nuns when he was around 5 years old. He tried to run away often and got flogged...
4 tags
My Family Gambles Part 9 "Dad's Three-Time Parlay"
The fall of 1987. I’m taking action for a good friend who was raised in a family of bookies. Lets call him Vinny. He’s paying me 300 bucks a week to answer the phone on Saturdays and Sundays to take bets on college and pro football games, from his steady flow of gamblers. On a good week he throws me some extra cash, 50, sometimes a hundred on a real good week.
On weekends I use...
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My Family Gambles Part 8 "Hot Tip" written by Mom...
I never gambled much years ago because I had no money. My first gambling experience was around 1964. My girlfriend Bobbi and her husband used to call in horse bets to a bookie. One day she called me to see if I wanted to make a bet and I told her no way, I had no money. She told me I could make some money. I couldn’t take the chance. The next day she called me to tell me she won, did I...
6 tags
My Family Gambles Part 7 "Delaware Park" written...
Shell and I went to Delaware Park . It was the first time we had ever gone there. Lost 4 or 5 races, was being cheap now. The next race was Arabian horses and a very long race. There was a horse named Lucky Tess (Tessie, my aunt’s name). I bet $5.00 to win and an exacta.
Race starts and Tess is in the back, the other horse is laying 3rd or 4th. Coming around the last turn, the other...
4 tags
drunk at rays
9am, breakfast at rays luncheonette with a friend. she drank till 6am, we got up at 830, grabbing a quick bite. long day ahead for both of us. she says,
“i kill about a million brain cells a day. my goal in life is to stop them from regenerating.”
jesus man.
8 tags
My Family Gambles Part 6 "Elevens" by Maxine...
I had for many years looked up at the clock exactly at 11:11. It became my practice to start making wishes and later affirmations, at the sight of those elevens. When I met Alan Smith at the bar on a Sunday afternoon in December, the Giants were playing the Cowboys. After a few lagers and a few missed field goals I suggested the wager: if the giants make this field goal, you take me out for...
